


The Best Secret is Shared Among Friends

by TimmyJaybird



Category: Batman - All Media Types
Genre: F/F, F/M, Foursome, Free-for-all, M/M, Multi, really how do I even tag this
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-04-16
Updated: 2015-04-16
Packaged: 2018-03-23 06:20:17
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,611
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3757687
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TimmyJaybird/pseuds/TimmyJaybird
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It's 2 AM, and all Bruce really wants is to sleep for one night. But when a certain clown shows up at his doorstep with two of Gotham's most gorgeous- and deadly- women, sleep becomes a thing of the past.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Best Secret is Shared Among Friends

**Author's Note:**

> This spawned from a tumblr post by [darkkillersheep](http://darkkillersheep.tumblr.com/) and some encouragement from [caesar-faust](http://caesar-faust.tumblr.com/). The original idea is more then just smut, so who knows, maybe this is something I'll add to one day.

The doorbell woke Bruce, only after it had rung for the third time. He groaned, rolling onto his side and glancing at the clock. After two AM. He had no idea _who the hell_ could need him at this hour, when he was simply Bruce, and not the Bat.

He almost regretted having sent Alfred away for the night, because it meant he had to be the one to bloody well get up and get to the door. He threw his robe on, not bothering with a shirt- or closing it, for that matter- and made his way downstairs, towards the front of the manor.

The bell had rung a few more times in the time it took to get there, and by the time he was opening it, he was gritting his teeth, hoping someone was bleeding out and in need of urgent care. Otherwise, he couldn’t think of a single reason _anyone_ should be bothering him at this hour. There were, after all, so few nights he actually slept.

Waiting for him, on his doorstep, was one grinning Joker, arms hooked around the waists of both Poison Ivy and Harley Quinn.

It was about the last thing Bruce had expected.

“What the hell-“

“Evening _Batsy_ ,” the Joker chimed, guiding the girls in and pushing right past Bruce. “Hope we didn’t, ah, wake you.”

“Sure as hell did,” Bruce muttered, closing the door and glaring at the three. It wasn’t the first time the Joker had shown up at his door- but usually Bruce was the one who _brought_ him here, after a little incident of exposed identity-

And a string of nights filled with some rather _satisfying_ sex.

“So Batman really _is_ Bruce Wayne,” Ivy said, placing her hands on her hips. “You two weren’t lying.” Bruce gritted his teeth, thinking he would like to smear his lover’s teeth along the floor in that moment- he didn’t doubt Harley would find out, sooner or later- but he had hoped the sex might be enough to keep the Joker from sharing _too_ much.

“Brucie, baby, _darling_ , simmer down. You’ll burst a blood vessel.” He pulled away from the women, walking over to the man and slipping right in against his chest, reaching up to stroke one finger along his jawline. “See, I couldn’t just keep a _big secret_ like this from my little Harley.”

“And I couldn’t keep such a thing from my Pam-a-lamb,” Harley chimed in, winking happily at the redhead.

“It can be our little secret,” the Joker added, finger running down Bruce’s neck, along the edge of his robe, over exposed skin. “Besides, when you see what I have planned for your night, you won’t, ah be _so mad_.”

Bruce opened his mouth to speak, but Harley was giggling, yelling, “I’m going to be the first one to the bed!” and then she was running towards the stairs, up blindly to find the master bedroom herself. Ivy was shortly behind her, determined to catch the little blonde before she got too far, and Bruce looked down at the clown with wide, dark eyes.

The Joker grinned at him, eyes flashing a dangerous shade of green, the playful kind that was sweet as candy. “Surprise, sugar.”

*

By the time Bruce and the Joker made it upstairs, the playboy’s bedroom door was flung open, and Harley was collapsed on the large bed, fanned out and grinning. She was saying something about laying on clouds when they entered, and the Joker grinned. He tore away from Bruce’s arm, jumping onto the bed with her and half rolling on her, throwing an arm around her and pulling her close.

Harley squealed, kicking one long leg up, giving Bruce a glimpse at the thin black fabric between her legs as her short dress hiked up her thighs. He blushed, looking away, only to catch Ivy’s stare at him, from a few steps away.

“You know, I think I like you being the Bat,” she decided, folding her arms. “You were always a handsome devil. Maybe we should make you wear your mask. I think I’d like to _rip it right off you_.” Bruce felt heat rising up in his cheeks, only worse when she stepped closer, reaching out to grasp at his robe and quickly yanking it down his shoulders. She reached out, traced one finger along a scar around his shoulder, smiling to herself. “Joker says you’ve got a lot of these. That they’re _fun_ to connect. Although he recommended I use my tongue.”

“This isn’t happening,” Bruce finally said, pulling back, looking over at the bed. The Joker was settled back into the pillows, watching, Harley curled up into his side.

“You don’t sound very _convincing_ , sugarplum,” he said. “Should I, ah, warm you up a bit?”

“No!” The Joker rolled his eyes, untangling from Harley and crawling to the edge of the bed. He pushed himself up onto his knees, grabbed Bruce’s wrist and pulled him in, down so he nearly lost his balance as the Joker crashed their lips together. Bruce felt the slide of skin and scar and lipstick, a familiar medley, and couldn’t help that his hand reached out to brace the back of the man’s neck- that he groaned when the Joker slipped his tongue into his mouth and teased the sharps of his teeth. Behind them, Harley was staring with large eyes on the bed, hands clasped together excitedly.

“Give it a try,” the Joker breathed nipping at his lower lip, “You might have a little _fun_.”

Bruce should have said no. He should have thrown them all out on their asses, crawled back into bed, and slept for one of the few precious nights in his life.

He should have, but instead he shoved the Joker back, climbing onto the bed and following him down, pinning him there and kissing him again, feeling the clown arch up against him, trying to hook a leg over his.

“Hell to the _yes_!” Harley cooed, pushing herself up devouring the sight. When she found out her Mr. J was doing the _do_ with Gotham’s good ‘ole Dark Knight, she was sure she could have nearly lost her mind then. In a _good_ way.

The clown was hot enough that she was okay watching him with others. And him beneath one of Gotham’s most handsome bachelors- and oh, he happened to _be_ the Bat- it was a wet dream come true, and she was going to commit every little bit of it to memory.

Bruce pulled back from the Joker, pushing himself up, watching the way the clown arched for more contact, loving the little whine he gave when it was denied. He smiled, was about to say something, when a pair of soft, slender hands was cupping his chin, turning his head-

And Ivy was there with her full, red lips, over taking his. For a brief moment it was terrifying- he knew the many ways she laced her lipstick- but the terror died as her mouth set a rhythm he couldn’t refuse, as his belly grew hot and he could admit this whole idea was _rather_ appealing.

“Damn Red,” Harley whispered, biting on her lower lip. Next to her, the Joker stayed on his back, staring up, watching as well.

Ivy settled one knee on the bed, then pressed her hands to Bruce’s bare chest, shoving him back. He fell to his back, barely missing the Joker’s leg as the clown curled up, shifting back to give them room. Smirking, Ivy crawled onto him, straddling his hips and letting her own dress ride up high on her thighs.

“You’ve got a reputation to live up to, _Mr. Wayne_ ,” she whispered, almost threatening, “I swear half of Gotham talks about what a good lay you are.”

“I can vouch for that,” the Joker giggled, loosening his tie.

“Still. I do like to test these theories _myself_.” She rocked her hips, and Bruce exhaled, feeling frozen beneath her. She glanced over at Harley and the Joker, flashing a pretty smile. “Harley sweetie, would you unzip me?”

The blonde nodded, crawling forward and reaching behind Ivy, pulling the zipper down the back of her dress. Her knuckles brushed against her spine, and Ivy purred, glancing down at Bruce through thick lashes.

Bruce’s hands were clenching at his sheets, staring as Harley helped guide Ivy’s dress off her shoulders, pooling it around her waist. Then, as if the girl simply couldn’t _handle_ Ivy being partially naked and not touching, she turned the redhead’s face to the side, kissing her rather sweetly. Ivy fell into it, grabbing Harley and sinking hands into her blonde hair, working his pigtails free and wrapping the locks around her fingers.

Bruce bit his lip, exhaling through his nose. The fact that Ivy was still _straddling_ him left him wanting to reach out and be a part of this, hold her hips as he rocked his own up into her- let her feel exactly what this had suddenly done to him- but it was mesmerizing, the way the two seemed to melt together.

Then Ivy was pushing Harley down, swinging her leg over Bruce so she was free of him and crawling over the girl, kissing her passionately. Harley’s hands raked down along her bare back, and Bruce pushed himself up on his elbows, just to have the Joker sliding down next to him.

Neither seemed ready to try and interject themselves, and were content watching as Ivy moved from Harley’s mouth to her neck, leaving light kisses that had the blonde sighing, arching up. One of Ivy’s hands was between them, rubbing the girl’s bare thigh as her own bare breasts pressed against Harley’s ribs.

“Should we,” Bruce started, and the Joker was reaching over, placing a hand on his chest.

“ _Shh_. Trust me, pretty boy, you don’t want to interrupt them yet.”

Bruce nodded, watching as Ivy’s hand shifted, gone between them- but from Harley’s sudden intake of breath, he didn’t need to _see_.

“Aw Harley, is this all for me?” Ivy whispered, his other hand tugging the girl’s dress down, freeing her breasts. Her fingers had slipped past Harley’s panties, rubbing along her slick folds and loving the way she squirmed. The blonde was nodding, sucking on her lip. Ivy smiled, bowing her head to let her tongue circle one soft pink nipple, before taking it in her mouth and having Harley buck against her, forcing her fingers to rub over her clit.

Bruce was transfixed, didn’t register at first the Joker next to him moving, until he glanced over and noticed the man had half stripped, bare chested now and pale and _simply too much_.

He looked about to move, but Bruce was faster, grabbing his arm before he could reach either Harley or Ivy, pulling him in and kissing him. It was quick, a press of lips, a nip at his scarred lip, and then Bruce was shoving him back, nodding his head as if encouraging whatever he had been about to do.

He leaned over Harley, kissing her as Ivy straightened up, stopping her touches to pull Harley’s panties off her, tossing them off the bed. Her dress came next, a haphazard movement of limbs between the three, Harley barely noticing as she whined into the Joker’s mouth, spreading her thighs when Harley was back to press two fingers into her, gently, curling them so her hips were bucking.

Bruce let it go on for a moment, and then he was on Ivy, getting on his knees to press up behind her, one hand reaching between her legs to rub her through her panties as she fucked Harley, loving the way she tipped her head back onto his shoulder- the way her ass pressed back into his groin. She smiled, biting her lower lip gently.

“Why _Batman_ , I was hoping you’d be this happy to see me.” She pulled her fingers from Harley, turning and instead palming Bruce through his cotton pajama pants, smiling as he groaned. “Be a dear for me, sweetie, and get rid of these. I rather dislike unwrapping presents myself.”

Bruce didn’t hesitate, and Ivy watched him get up from the bed to finish stripping, her eyes raking over him like the Joker’s nails had so many times. Behind her, Harley was watching too, the Joker having gotten her to sit up, his teeth on her neck and arms around her, hands splayed on her belly. He glanced, smirking into her neck, before one hand delved down between her thighs, rubbing her clit softly, enough to make her squirm and gasp.

“On the bed,” Ivy said, jerking her head. “On your back, like a good boy.”

Bruce obeyed- he really didn’t feel like there was much of a choice, with the way Ivy was looking at him. He settled on the bed- painfully aware of his cock pressing up against his belly, and watched Ivy stand for just a second, fully stripping of her clothing, before she climbed back on-

And directly straddled him. Hands splayed on his belly, she rolled her hips, sliding up along him, his cock pressed between her wet cunt and his belly. He groaned, tipped his head back as she did it again, chuckling to herself.

“Mmm, I can already tell you’re going to be a fun one, _Bruce_.” One hand moved beneath her, grasped his cock, holding him steady as she eased herself onto him- wet enough that Bruce could have sworn she had been warmed up before she even got to the manor.

Oh, that idea was mind-buzzingly _perfect_.

Bruce groaned as she settled on his cock, felt the bed shifting as Harley was shoved down next to him-

And then heard her cry out. Ivy didn’t move, glancing down as Bruce pushed himself up slightly, but watching as one of Harley’s legs hooked over the Joker’s shoulders, his mouth pressed to the sweet juncture of her thighs. Her other leg crossed over one of Bruce’s- and that connection was enough to jar him slightly, for his hands to find Ivy’s hips and help lift her, allow her to ride him slowly, easily. She let her head roll, closing her eyes and smiling as Bruce filled her body so sweetly, gently brushing along the nerves inside her that sent sweet chills down her spine.

The sound of Harley’s moans next to her, they only added to it. She glanced over at the blonde, at the flush along her cheeks and neck, easing its way down onto her breasts. Smiling to herself, she whispered, “How’s it _feel_ Harley?” and felt Bruce’s hand run from her hip to her ass, grasping flesh as he pushed up into her harder- obviously just as excited over the question as her.

“G-ood,” Harley gasped, her hips rising as the Joker’s mouth closed around her clit, sucked gently for a second before his tongue was back, rubbing up and down over the tiny bud of flesh, leaving her gasping. Harley’s belly was in knots, and she was reaching out next to her, managing to steal one of Bruce’s hands from Ivy’s hips and lacing their fingers together, clutching onto him as if the feelings were simply _too much_.

Bruce had been at the mercy of the Joker’s mouth. He understood.

“Keep at it Joker,” Ivy breathed, lifting herself and resuming rocking along with Bruce’s hips. “I wanna hear my little buttercup _cum_.”

The Joker grasped at Harley’s thighs, pushing them up slightly, her bare heel digging harder into his back as he continued to ravish her- leaving her nearly screaming. Ivy liked that sound- liked it most when she was the cause- and reached down, fingers pushing between her legs to rub her clit as she leaned forward a bit, giving Bruce easier access to push deep into her- faster, with whatever pace he chose.

He chose to clutch her hip with his free hand and fuck her so hard she couldn’t help but cry out, her fingers shaking between her legs. She’d been so worked up before crawling onto him, and the over-stimulation of having Harley next to her, losing her very fragile mind- well, it was easy for her to let it well up in her belly, between her thighs, a wet heat until Bruce hit that spot inside her just right one-time too many, and she was crying out, wiping her head back, red waves cascading around her shoulders as she shook, her cunt clenching around Bruce’s cock, dragging him deep, welcoming him back as he fucked her through it, until she felt like liquid and collapsed down, with him still inside her, simply unable to move.

Next to her, only a moment later, Harley was _screaming_ , clutching Bruce’s hand so tightly as her own orgasm wrecked her, arching her hips up entirely off the bed. The Joker didn’t falter, nor did he pull away until she had fallen back to the mattress and was squirming away, over stimulation nearly causing her pain.

When he finally pushed himself up onto his knees, lips and chin wet, he was grinning, running his hands along Harley’s thighs. Bruce took only a moment to stare, before he was wrapping one arm around Ivy’s waist, holding her onto him still and sitting up, reaching for the clown with the hand Harley had previously held, pulling him in close.

His tongue ran up his chin, to the corner of his mouth, teased the edge of a scar before he kissed him, digging a hand into his hair and pulling. The Joker groaned into the kiss, felt a set of nails running down his spine as Ivy leaned over, kissing his shoulder. The moment Bruce released his mouth, she was there- matching red lips, licking the taste of Harley from his tongue and scars.

“She’s too sweet,” Ivy breathed, and the Joker grinned.

“Like candy, Red.”

Harley was giggling beneath them, and in that moment Bruce smirked to himself. It seemed a bit of a miss to untangle from Ivy- and oh, how he hated it, she was still warm and wet and he was still achingly hard- but it was worth it when he managed to grasp the blonde, pulling Harley’s hips up and bowing down to press his mouth to her cunt. She trembled, hands scrambling along the bed as he lapped at her, then smiled to himself.

“I can’t disagree.” The Joker laughed then, as Ivy pressed her mouth to a scar on his collar bone, her hands working to open his pants. Bruce was easing Harley’s hips back down to the bed, but as Ivy worked to undress the Joker, the blonde grabbed Bruce and kissed him, taking his hand and guiding it right between her thighs, welcoming the two fingers he slipped inside her.

“We can do this _all night_ sugar,” Harley breathed into Bruce’s mouth, “I promise you can have another taste.”

He groaned, curled his fingers, and Harley shuddered, clawing at his shoulders with her sharp nails. A sensation he was used to- welcomed.

The Joker was rather proud to see Bruce shiver as Harley clawed him, letting his lids fall half shut as Ivy had grasped his neglected cock, stroking him slowly. Her teeth had bitten down on his chest, left a ring of red indents that might sting soon, if he could make sense of the endless stream of stimuli he was receiving.

“You’re turn,” Ivy whispered, letting her tongue run over the bite mark and then turning away from the Joker, on her hands and knees. She watched over her shoulder as he kicked his pants off, nearly laughed, but was quiet then when his hand pressed to her lower back, and he eased into her. Ivy groaned, pushing back against him, nerves lighting up as he pulled back after only a half-thrust- then pushed into her so hard she jerked forward. She tumbled down, her arms sprawling as the Joker dug nails into the small of her back.

Harley glanced down at Ivy, grinned and left Bruce’s mouth, choosing to help pull the woman back up to be braced on her arms, kissing her happily. The moment Harley pulled away from Ivy’s mouth Bruce was there, sucking her breath again- the two switching back and forth, sending Ivy’s mind into a blur.

The Joker _knew_ how to fuck her. This wasn’t their first time- and even if it had been, Harley had told him enough that he knew _exactly_ what Ivy liked. Especially for her second orgasm.

He gritted his teeth, a few green curls hanging into his forehead as he bent over her, one arm wrapping around her, fingers squeezing one overly-sensitive nipple. She shook, as Harley’s tongue pushed int her mouth, as Bruce tangled a hand in her hair, as the Joker’s cock filled her so perfectly-

And she came with a rush, whining into Harley’s mouth as her cunt squeezed the Joker’s cock, as his nails dug into her breast- an utterly perfect jolt of pain to keep her mind from going damn near numb at the sensations. His thrusts slowed, until he was still, the scars on his cheek dragging along her shoulder blades as he nuzzled her rather affectionately.

When the Joker looked up, Bruce was staring at him. His eyes were near black, a look the Joker knew well- from both this _pretty boy_ and from his Bat.

“I think it’s his turn,” Bruce finally said, moving for the clown. Harley guided Ivy away from him- both whining at their loss of contact- and Bruce pulled the Joker to him, kissing him roughly. His hands clutched at the clown’s back, fingers finding scars and pressing to them, allowing the lithe man to squirm only closer.

“Whatcha gonna do, Bats?” Harley asked, watching the two with more focus then anything in her life. Next to her, Ivy was reclining in the pillows, happy for a moment of reprieve to let her body come down from its high.

“I think,” Bruce breathed, pressing the Joker flush to him, watching the clown’s eyes roll slightly as their cocks bumped, rubbing between their bodies. “I’m going to fuck him _senseless_.” He tugged on the man’s hair, jerked his head back and glanced over at Harley. “Do me a favor, in the nightstand-“

“Oh I’m _on it_ Bats.” Bruce pressed his mouth to the Joker’s neck, sucking on his pulse, on skin, made his way up to his scars and let his tongue dart along one half of his Glasgow smile. When Harley was back, holding the small bottle in her hand, Bruce let his hand run down the Joker’s back, along scars and the ribs of his spine, and grabbed a handful of flesh.

“Make sure he’s _ready for me_ , Harley.”

The blonde bit her lip, slicking up her fingers and pressing along the Joker’s back. She pressed them to his hole, a light, teasing pressure, whispered up to him, “Are ya ready for me _suga_?” The Joker pushed back onto her fingers then, Harley gasping as badly as he did, as Bruce smirked. He let his hands roam the clown, alone scars, the faint ghosts of bruises, down his chest and belly, until one hand grasped his leaking cock, stroking him slowly. Slower then Harley was fucking him.

“Give him another, Harley,” Ivy said, “I want to hear him _whine_.”

Harley pushed a third finger in, winking at Ivy as the Joker groaned, let his head drop so his forehead rested on Bruce’s shoulder. He could barely remember to breathe, wasn’t sure if he should push back against Harley’s fingers and forward into Bruce’s hand. Wasn’t sure what he wanted more.

An answer was forced on him when Bruce released his cock, and Harley took her queue, pulling her fingers from his body. He was thrown down onto his back, and then Bruce was between his splayed thighs, stroking himself, Harley tossing the little plastic bottle in one hand, half wishing she’d gotten to be the one to make sure he was wet enough for the Joker’s body.

When Bruce leaned over the Joker, it was second nature to lift his hips, to arch his back as his lover pushed into him that first time. One leg hooked over the Bat’s hip, and Bruce clutched at it, fingers digging into his thigh. The Joker groaned, rolling his hips with each thrust, panting as he clutched at the sheets.

Harley settled into Ivy arms, reaching out and taking one of the Joker’s hands, thumb tracing over a scar on his knuckles. The redhead nuzzled her hair, embraced her tightly, enjoying the view from over her shoulder as the Joker came undone so quickly- gasps and grunts turning into sharp cries, pleas-

And Bruce didn’t deny him anything. When he begged for _harder_ Bruce listened, grabbing his other thigh so the Joker’s legs wrapped around his waist and fucking him with abandon, no longer needing control. This was one of those few precious moments, that one _specific_ person, where he could forget how to contain himself- where limits meant nothing. Whatever he gave, he knew the Joker could take.

In that moment, though, the night had welled hot and heavy up in the clown’s belly. He was undiluted and ready to nearly sob with each of Bruce’s thrusts, his cock heavy and leaking on his belly. Bruce’s hands were clutching his thighs, so he reached for it himself, sucking in breath and nearly sobbing with his first stroke. Bruce, over him, smirked- a devious, almost sick sort of twist to his lips, and squeezed his thighs with bruising force.

He didn’t _have_ to tell the Joker to cum for him. He didn’t have to say a word those eyes, damn near black now, they were enough, burning right into the Joker’s very core. He threw his head back, arching his back fully off the bed as he screamed himself raw, saw white spots in his vision as his came on his own belly.

A few sharp thrusts and Bruce was joining him, leaning over him and groaning, low and guttural from his chest, emptying himself into the clown. The moment he released his hold on the Joker’s thighs the lithe man collapsed to the bed, staring wide eyed at the ceiling, feeling Harley clenching his hand, but little else-

Until Bruce stretched out next to him, rolling the man onto his side and holding him back against his chest, nuzzling the nape of his neck, his slightly damp curls. The Joker sighed, didn’t move as Harley stretched out along his chest, throwing an arm over his waist and letting her fingers tease the line of Bruce’s muscles. Behind her, Ivy had settled in.

“I’m going to kill you in the morning,” Bruce whispered, “All three of you.” There was a round of tired giggles, of subtle shifts as everyone got comfortable, sheets and the blanket being tugged around.

Bruce closed his eyes, deciding he’d dare to trust these three long enough for him to get a few hours of sleep, when he heard the Joker whisper, “You’re really gonna wanna wash these sheets, Bats.”

He squeezed him tightly, cutting off the man’s giggles, only to have to listen to Harley and Ivy laugh as well. And, despite his best efforts, he smiled into the Joker’s scarred shoulder.

Maybe not all the clown’s ideas were bad, after all.

“I should make plans when I have a,” the Joker started giggling, “ _ha-ha-hard on_ more often.”

Bruce groaned. Maybe his ideas weren’t all bad, but his jokes were.

**Author's Note:**

> Foursomes are harder then I thought. So many bodies.
> 
> Also, my only claim to fame ever is saying _ha-ha-hard on_.


End file.
